Enough with all the fucking romance, OK? It’s getting bastard frightening. People are getting engaged and laying wedding plans all over the fucking place, and it’s becoming vomitous. And frankly, if you’re going to get engaged, do it some time that isn’t Valentines Day. I’ve had “We’re getting married!” announcements coming at me right left and centre for the last three or four fucking days, and I’m fucking sick of it. If this happens again next year, I shall start firebombing bridal shops.

Now I am going to swill down whiskey and indulge in bitter misanthropy. I’m fed up with quite liking the world, and being happy for all its damn happy and romantic people.

Now fuck off and stop bothering me.