On the one hand, my heart goes out to her and her family. On the other hand her condition could radically transform our understanding of the ageing process, which could be a game-changer….

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you a horrifyingly accurate psychological portrait of Kieron Gillen, acclaimed author of Phonogram and Beta Ray Bill: Godhunter. Warning: not suitable for children, those of a nervous disposition, or really, anyone.