Do you know why it’s been so bloody cold?

It’s all the bloody pagans fault. It seems as though all the pagans I know have equinox ceremonies coming up this weekend. Except that the equinox was yesterday. Just after midnight, in fact. And so the spirits, gods and monsters that attend the new season have been waiting for their ceremonies of spring, except the bloody hippies have put them all off until the weekend, as if mystically important days were something that happened only when convenient. And like any self-respecting gods whose worshippers aren’t up to scratch, they’re making the displeasure known.

Sort it out, pagans. Other people would like some spring.